Let me preface this rant with a confession: Not long ago, I too, suffered such plagues as those to be mentioned shortly. Twas I that brought the ceramic Jack-O-Lantern soap dispenser and light up skull walkway sensor lights out of the attic last September …
Last Friday afternoon, instead of actually doing something productive, I was perusing Facebook and I stumbled upon a post from a sorority sister of mine, Reynie. Yep, Florida State Tri Delt Reynie. Most of the people who went to FSU in the mid to late 90’s will remember her. She was quite a ball of energy. She was one of the first people I remember meeting on Bid Day in Tallahassee some 17 years ago…miniature blue triangles painted on her cheeks, a deep Southern drawl, bursting about with excitement doing cartwheels on the front lawn of 524 E. Park Avenue. Anyway, you get the picture. To quote her post precisely, ” I just read my little one “Elf On A Shelf” for the first time this season… we get things started early around here! (May I add this was much to my husband’s disapproval!)”
I have some thoughts on this…
1. This was posted on OCTOBER 26th…yes, October 26th…no Elf on the Shelf in October…no Elf on the Shelf in November…Elf on the Shelf is for December
2. I’d really like to meet Reynie’s husband. I like him already because;
i. He disapproves of an October appearance of Elf on the Shelf
ii. He married Reynie
3. Christmas store displays should be banned until at least mid November
I am going to take this opportunity to not just single Reynie out…how about Kelly from Tallahassee who takes the Christmas card photo of her children in October and, for the 9 years I have known her, has always ensured her card is delivered no later than December 1st? Or, Tessa from North Carolina, who 2 weeks ago busted out her “Countdown to Christmas” timer and, so reported by my husband, was ADDRESSING HER CHRISTMAS CARDS LAST WEEK???
Now I know every plastic sparkly candy cane manufacturing company has their actuaries and marketing people locked in a tiny room, furiously plucking their eyelashes out whilst comparing spreadsheets. I am sure it is proven that “If you display it, they will buy it, they will buy all of it, even if it’s July”. But Christmas in October is getting down right out of control.
And then, then I witnessed the unthinkable last Friday evening. My middle child and I were out shopping for Hurricane supplies, and the store we went to had just one shelf of Halloween items left (already at a 40% discount) and their entire fake-Christmas-Tree-LED-light-extravaganza-blow-up-Frosty-plastic-light-up-baby-Jesus (more on this at a later time) on display. ¼ of the store was dedicated to a season technically 6 weeks away from beginning. And of all places- it was Home Depot. Home Depot! I would expect such behavior out of Target, but not Home Depot.